Unique Memories - special to my heart

I need to write down these for my children and since I am making this into a book this is a great place to write it down. These are some memories that my kids have forgotten buy I never will.

Madison - When Madison was very little she used to tell me stories at bedtime about picking flowers with Jesus. She said that they would go for walks and pick flowers and she would pick flowers for me and Daddy. One day she stopped telling me the story and forgot. (she has always been so thoughtful)

Jaxon - When Jaxon was very little he used to get very upset sometimes and tell us that he wanted to go home. We were at our house when he would do this and the only thing that would calm him is to go in our room with Dad (Paul) and comfort him. He would insist that he wanted to go home. I truly believe that he missed Heaven, that was the only explanation we could figure out. He has always had a very tender heart (totally boy but such a good hear)

Greta - When Jaxon was little, around 4 months, I started feeling like maybe we should have another baby. Wow I already had a baby :) Some months after that I started thinking that I saw an image of a child with blonde hair out of the corner of my eye. Sometimes in the kitchen, bathroom, etc. Of course when I turned to look there was no child there. When Jaxon was about 10 monts old I got pregnant with Greta and I stopped seeing a child out of my perphial vision. Greta was such a bubbily baby and so social. She loved everyone! She was the baby when my mom passed away and we all loved getting extra hugs from her.

Wil - Once again I started seeing a child out of my perphial vision, and of course once again there was no child when I turned around. It was never a freaky thing just different. I found out I was pregnant while we were preparing for my mother's funeral. I lost the baby but found out I was pregnant again shortly after. I didn't even know that it was possible, when I went to see the doctor the nurse made the comment that my baby was not waiting around. When Wil was born my dad commented to me that he was the last one of us to talk to my mom.

Ava - We were told to not having any more children after Wil. My pregnancies are not the best and my uterus is thin. The doctor wanted to tie my tubes when I had my C-Section for Wil but I would start crying anytime I tought about it. So when Wil was 4 and I started seeing a blonde child out of my perphial vision again (always the same) I was shocked. I told Paul about it and we didn't know what we thought. Then Paul told me one day that Madison had told him something weeks ago and he hadn't wanted to tell me at the time because I had a lot on my mind with moving. He said that Madison was walking past the boys room and thought she saw a child jumping from one bed to the other but when she went in there was no one. She thought it was odd and told him about it. We started thinking about what if and Paul decided one day (1 day out of over 4 years) that maybe we were supposed to have another child. The next day he changed his mind because he was worried about me plus we had four children. But Ava took her 1 chance and we were blessed with our baby. We had deal with stopping preterm labor several times and when I had the C-Section the doctor said my uterus did not look good, even after the long break so he did tie my tubes but I feel so blessed to have the 5 Wonderful children I have!!!

Sidenote - I shared the experience of seeing a child out of the corner of my eye with my father and the fact that it doesn't happen after I get pregnant or until it was time for us to add to our family. He asked me if we would have another baby after Ava because the child always looked like a boy but I said no that I felt it was more a push that it was time than seeing my child. Someday I will know if it was a future grandchild, great grandchild or if it was just a slight push. When the doctor wanted to tie my tubes after Ava I didn't have that awful feeling, I just felt content.

Mom (Joella)